About Me

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I am the working mother of two little minions, just on a new adventure in another province away from my seaside home trying desperately to solve life's many riddles and find inner peace despite all the chaos...and when all else fails there's always wine.

Monday, January 21, 2013

LOVE, DON'T LOVE

I have been wanting to come up with something witty, and entertaining and enlightening to write about but alas, I am just too exhausted to stick to a coherent thought or word these days. As such I am going to satisfy my inclination to blog about Alberta life by sharing some of the things I love, and definitely do not love about living here:



LOVE:
  • Snow - it's just so darn, pretty and wintry - a total post-cardish novelty for us west coasters
  • Plus 15s - not only are they warm and convenient but each time I navigate the maze I feel like I'm in some secret, futuristic world where everybody has to stay inside to survive (aka Calgary)
  • The Rockies - do I really need to explain? Just stunning
  • No Ferries - again, do I really need to explain?
  • Reading on the train
  • My job
  • Our neighbours
  • Logan's school - it's fantastic and listening to him sing french songs is so freakin' cute!
  • Garbage and recycling pick up - no sorting, just dump in the bin and drag to the side of the road, yes we have to pay for this service, but can you tell I'm a small town girl? I think the whole take my crap away (or in this case my cat's crap) feels like a total luxury.
  • Proximity of our mailbox
  • That everything is everywhere - I'm 30 seconds away from the post office, food, insurance offices, banks, dentist's, clothing stores, tailors, book stores etc. If I need to take care of something or find something on my lunch break, it's doable!
  • Cheap fuel - goes a long way when you have a long commute and a gas guzzling truck
  • Again No Ferries - this deserves mentioning again
  • I think it's darker in the morning here, but it's lighter later in the day
  • The city skyline in the early morning and at night
  • The sound and sight of the freight train rolling through Cochrane - even if it's every 20 minutes
  • I haven't seen rain in almost 4 months!!!
  • I'm closer to my Alberta family and friends
  • The excuse to wear leg warmers 
  • Safeway liquor store - airmiles and convenience

DO NOT LOVE:
  • Driving in the snow
  • Shoveling the snow
  • Sweeping snow off of the truck
  • Frozen, slippery snow (in other words I just like looking at snow)
  • Larry being away so much so far
  • Paper health care cards - I thought this province had money??
  • The photo on my new AB driver's licence - yikes!
  • Pushy, rude, inconsiderate, asshole commuters - what's wrong with you people?
  • How dirty the truck is all the time and the way the kids feel the need to rub themselves on it right after I've washed their jackets
  • How dry it is here - I am itchy all the time, my hair looks like a static experiment and I haven't been able to breath clearly out of my nose for 3 months
  • That it's a really, really, really, long walk to the ocean, let alone a drive - new for me
  • That it's a really, really, really, long walk to our friends and family back on the coast - also new for me.
  • No Rain - Though I don't miss being damp and wet all the time and the long, depressing grey of a west coast winter, I do honestly miss a good ole thunderstorm or Sundays when it would rain, ALL DAY, and as such you'd have the perfect excuse to stay in your jammies and eat breakfast for dinner, and watch movies or read or snuggle up by the fire and make chili on the wood stove.  Here it's so gall darn sunny, I have to close the blinds and curtains and "pretend" its not nice.
  • The Calgary Flames

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

DRUNK DUDE ON THE TRAIN

This poor guy fell asleep on the train today. I'm pretty sure he missed his stop, perhaps somebody, including me, should have woken him up.  He kept dropping his beer on the floor but on the plus side he was very gracious and offered a beer to all the people around him, including the elderly east indian lady next to him who looked absolutely terrified. About three stops before the end of the line he passed out across the bench, after said, terrified lady, departed the train.  By two stops before end of line, he was snoring like he was in a coma, oh lord, what if he was in a coma? How awful.  The girl next to me was trying to sneakily, turn her phone this way and that to get a picture of him, she was failing miserably and kept retrying over and over again.  I have to admit, drunk, snoring guy passed out on the train was kind of funny, however, it struck me how awfully sad it was as well.  I have seen this same guy on the train before in his Dickies, work coveralls, worn and leathery face that looks as tired as my winter boots.  To look at him, you'd peg him instantly as old, drunk, working man, however one time, when I saw him fairly sober, and awake, he made a point of offering his seat to every woman that came on and off the train. If you've witnessed the complete and total lack of manners and respect almost 95% of train commuters have for their human comrades, you'd appreciate just how extraordinary and touching, drunk, passed out guy's gallantry was. Dude has more decency than anybody else I've yet to see come and go from the guts of the big, metal LRT beast. The train conductor woke him up and probably had some words about the smattering of empty beer cans covering his lap like settled flies.  I hope he got home safe and sound, and that he wasn't driving anywhere.

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

AN INVISIBLE STAIRCASE

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase"  I have been reading a lot of quotes lately and this one stuck (well they all tend to stick given that I go through a lot of post-its). 

In the grand scheme of life, things are wonderful.  I know that one should count their wealth not based on the dollars in the bank but rather on the blessings such as health, laughter, love etc. that accumulate in our lives; these are true riches.  By nature I am not naturally a positive person; it's something that I've really had to work at and that has evolved in my character, out of necessity, over the last few years.  Thus the insatiable appetite for positive, uplifting quotes and mantras.  I am also naturally risk averse and a planner. I like to have a plan, more appropriately, I feel like I NEED to have a plan.  I once said to Larry, as we joked about selling everything to sail around the world. "Sure, I'll do it, as long as we never see stormy weather."  This statement sums up my entire outlook.  "I will accept any challenge, as long as you promise nothing will ever go wrong."  A rather childish demand, for sure. 

There was a time in our lives when things were painfully status quo. We didn't think we'd ever move anywhere, or do anything, or travel anywhere, etc. etc.  Life was beautifully and yet painfully predictable. Our souls were starving but I could MAP everything perfectly. 

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase"


Ever since I was laid off from my job with Lafarge in 2009 (which don't get me wrong, was quite possiblY the greatest thing to ever happen to me), I've lost my sense of thinking that the world was predictable, that I knew how it would all work out.  I understand that this event was the catalyst in my life to teach me to let go, to learn as I like to say, "not to hope for everything to be okay, but rather to hope to be okay with everything."   However, there is still the remnants of "I want my life to be predictable and stable, and predictable and stable, and all that Jenessa" that keeps wishing for things to "normalize" or calm down.  This is laughable.  We are on a staircase right now and I have no way of really knowing where it leads....this is okay....this is obviously what the universe intends. 

The other day, when I was driving home from work, I was thinking about how I'm totally the type of person that has to figure everything out. Movies, TV shows, books, board games, unsolved household mysteries...I need to figure it out.  Also a sign that I am hopelessly addicted to order, is that I became an Accountant....everything must be balanced, and forecasted, and "fit."  

From the moment I said yes to this journey to leave behind our ocean home, I have had to deal with the invisible staircase, the unknown, the unpredictable, the unplannable, it both excites and terrifies me.  We are so very blessed, so "rich" with all the amazing people, experiences, lessons, comforts and opportunities that have been woven into our lives through the years.  I never would have thought that one day I'd be typing this blog, from an office in Calgary, calling Alberta my home. I never would have thought that one day I'd be on Oprah, or that I'd snorkel in tropical waters (given my irrational fear of sharks and water).  There are so many things big and small that have transpired that I never could have guessed would come about.  Why, therefore, I keep insisting on trying to figure out where the staircase is going, I have no idea. 

I have days where I feel like sprinting up the staircase, without a care in the world and days where I feel like sitting on a step and hugging myself.  Where am I going? Excitement and Terror.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase"

Life is beautiful and mysterious and unpredictable. "Did you hear that self?? UN-PRE-DICT-A-BLE.  Suck it up princess and take another step."